“No, I’m not coming home because I’d rather be here with her”. These were the words he spoke to me in  his girlfriend’s presence. Instantly my heart  filled with pain… Pain that consisted of betrayal, hopelessness and rage all at the same time. As they walked away together, I drove off with my head down attempting to hold back my tears.

SEVEN MONTHS EARLIER …

June 30th 2009 had finally arrived! Me and my children had literally begun a count down five days prior. This was the big day when my husband/their father would return home from being away for one agonizing year. We were all ecstatic about this day and it was finally here. The trip there to pick him up seemed longer than any of the trips we’d ever taken. I tried to control my emotions and not be so anxious but every part of me was eager. Me and my husband had such a bright future now because we both had decided to follow God and allow Him as He became the third fold in our marriage. We made so many plans for our future and it seemed promising since God was for us.

After a three-week vacation, I expected to return to work on Monday. My family and I were having an awesome time catching up on everything we had missed. We attended church regularly and often times we had bible study together. At the time we were residing with my father in a two bedroom home. Our space was very limited yet our family was perfect because we were now together.

As the days went on and the weather changed, I found myself sick daily and extra tired. I was expecting and this pregnancy appeared as the worse one yet. I was still working each and everyday in spite of how I felt. We had goals that needed toaccomplished before the arrival of our new baby. Needless to say, I was the only one in pursuit.

My husband hadn’t found a permanent job yet nor one that paid what he desired. He ceased from attending church with us and to add insult to injury; he went back to his old ways. Too often I was going to work and/or church and coming home only to find him still asleep. I was beginning to feel alone once again. By this time I was seven months pregnant and exhausted. My exhaustion went far beyond my pregnancy. My husband’s behavior was doing more harm internally than I could imagine. So I gave him an ultimatum. I asked him to either stay, serve the Lord and lead his family or go. (In hope that he would choose to stay) Not only did he choose to leave but he left.

To be continued …